A year has passed already. Have you ever had a conversation affect you so profoundly that you can look back and pinpoint that moment in your past as THE moment that changed the course of your entire future? I have one of those and it happened exactly one year ago today.
It’s taken me a year to really talk about it because this was one of the hardest moments of my life. In fact, after I got off the phone my husband looked at me and said “You look like you were just broken up with.” That’s what it felt like, but I didn’t realize at the time that it’s exactly what had just happened.
You see I had met this phenomenal business mentor a couple of months prior and I was really diving into her instructions. For the first time in my 13 year journey as an entrepreneur I was seeing real results and without having to feel salesy and gross about it. This was revolutionary for me and even though I was working 40-60 hours a week, I was finding pockets of time around that job to set up my website and start blogging and reaching out to MY people.
For whatever reason, rumours were flying about my new mentor and I was told that I couldn’t be promoted if I continued down the path I was on. This nearly broke me because I had been working side by side this person for five years and I thought that we were building something together. I was wrong.
So I get off the phone and I’m almost in tears because everything I’ve worked towards over the last five years was for nothing but it’s time for the weekly zoom call with this mentor. I choke back my tears for the entire call and even though I had never spoken on one up to that point when she asked if anyone had a last question I knew that no one else answered because it was my moment. I explained the situation as best I could without dishonouring anyone and I ask something along the lines of “What do I do now? Everything I was working towards is gone. I have to start over and rebuild all by myself.” Cue the lump in my throat.
She looked me straight in the eye and asked me a question that changed my life.
“Does this feel lighter though? Does the thought of letting go of what you’ve been holding onto for the last few years feel lighter to you?”
Up to that moment I hadn’t even asked myself that question. All I could see was the pain and the loss of years gone to waste. She saw right through that and asked me a question that I felt guilty even considering answering.
Did it feel lighter? Yes. A million times yes.
Did I feel guilty that it felt lighter? Yes. A millions times yes.
I’m glad that I didn’t realize at the time that saying yes to letting go of that job would also mean losing a thirteen year friendship. I’m not sure I would have signed up for that level of pain. My business has skyrocketed since then and I’ve made more working from home than I ever dreamed possible.
Success has a price though. It will require you to let go of the chains holding you down even if those chains are disguised as friendships. Is it time for you to let go of the chains? The interesting thing about them is that they were never actually holding you down. You were the one holding on to them and keeping yourself close to the ground. You were meant to fly friend. So let go and fly.